A step that change everything

Have you ever wonder once you move a step then everything will be different. 

Have anyone of you think about this before.

I just realize it is actually important to move a step forward first. 

It might change the entire story or life. 

Seems so dramatic. 

But I think it is quite true.

I have been wondering. 

How if I didn't move the step.

How if I move the step.

What will be happen. 

Nobody will know. 

Recently, I feel like I am a dumbfoolish girl! 

What is actually happening to me. 

My brain, please focus on  your study! 

My heart, please close the wound faster!

My eyes, please see the next person properly.

My ears, please listen carefully and attentively. 

My hands, please hold the right next person tightly. 

My legs, please walk with the right next person slowly.

Finally, my heart, please feel and treat the right next person sweetly.

Haha.

I hope I can do the above that I mentioned:) 

Loves. 

Noobie me. Haha.

Fatty me. :p

Crazy me. XD

My bestbuddy, shiwei:)

I don't know where I get the courage from.

I seriously don't know what happen to me yesterday. 

I think I seriously went crazy already.

But thanks to my sweetheart, shiwei for always being with me.

Without her, I think I couldn't make my first step.

Thanks 38po for always being with me. You know how grateful am I to have you as me bestbudy. Even though we seldom meet yet we are still close. And we got lots of topics to chat. Non stop chatting and laughing yesterday. Haha! I think I make you crazy yesterday too! XD

Seriously, I love your soup and bracelet:) 

Thanks for being so understanding to me. ❤❤❤❤❤ I think you are the only who can read my mind even though I hide my feeling! 

Haha.

You seriously my bestbuddy. Mwahhh. 

Your delicious abc soup. Slurppp. ❤

❤❤❤❤❤ p/s: don't mad on me for this photo ya. XD 

When wanna hangout again ya, 38po? 

It seems like we have been a time didn't I out together le:(

Miss the time we spend together and shop together at kl:) 

my grandma :)

i think i never blog about my grandma before.

my grandma or i usually call her as mama.

she is a brave and sweet lady.

she never say no whenever you need her help.

i still remember when i am a kid, she used to hold my hand and carried my school bag for me.

she used to walk out with me to wait for my school bus.

she offered her help to carry my heavy school bag even though she was tired.

she never say NO whenever she can help.

but when time pass.

wrinkles start to appear on her face.

her back start to hunch.

her appetite is not as good as before.

last time, when i hold her hand i can felt the fleshy and warm hand.

but i dont know since when her hand is becoming skinnier and skinnier.

when i hold her hand recently, i can felt her bone :(

she was so brave and strong when she is admitted in the hospital.

she even recognize me.

she used to tell me to drive slowly and not to back often to visit her.

she told me she scare i will skip my class.

when she is in ICU, she is so weak until she barely speak.

yet she still tell me she is fine.

tears rolling when i saw her lying on the bed with weak body.

then she is transferred to HDU. 

i am so lucky to have my day with my grandma at hospital.

i promised my grandma to overnight at there and accompany her.

i was late for 15mins and i'm so sorry to make my grandma worried.

she thought i am lost or being kidnapped. :')

nurse told me that my grandma has been calling my name for several times :(

sorry for making you so worried :/

then she is transferred to normal ward.

i thought you are in recovering process.

but NO, you mentioned that you wanted to go home.

and you said that even if you wanted to leave us you will leaved us at home :(

then you are finally home.
but you are weaken than before.
oxygen supplier is a need for you cause you barely breath.
when i step into your room, tears start to roll down.
but i hold my tears and call you several times.
slowly you open your eyes and smile with a weak smile.
i say you will be fine and dont worry.
you just smile:')
the next day, i still manage to make a cup of milk for you.
you say you wanted to take the medicine.
i thought you will be okay.
but time pass.
you left us at 3.45pm :'(
now, is almost 2 weeks you left us.
but memories of you are still fresh in my mind.
#imissyou#grandma
i hope you are enjoying yourself at another world and remember to take good care of yourself.
i will take good care of myself here.
so, dont worry about me:)
#iloveyou#memories#

:(

you will forever important in my heart, my lovely grandma:')

iloveyou <3

it has been a month. :/

hey there!
haha.
i dont know whether people are still reading my blog.
since i abandon it for so long.
it has been a month since i break up with him.
well.
it's not easy to pass through these days.
the hardest days is break up during final exam!
it seriously hurts a lot as i seriously put a lot of effort in this relationship.
friends around me, they noticed my changes.
but HE never noticed it.
i change from not going out with boyf to going out with HIM even though still not so frequent.
i change from not finding my boyf first to find HIM and wait for him to finish his labwork.
i change from not talking so much about my boyf to frequently talk about HIM with my friends.
i change from not texting my boyf first to texting HIM first sometimes.
i change from not requesting a recover for a r'ship to texting HIM and request to save back the r'ship.
i change from not crying for a guy to crying for HIM so much.
i change from not being a understanding girl to a understanding girlf to HIM.
i change alot because of him.
i know i aint a good girlf for my past r'ship.
but i tried to change a lot for him.
and he didnt realize it.
do you thought i am so strong?
i'm just pretending all the way!
i'm just pretending strong in front of my friends.
i still laugh. i still smile.
yet i feel hurt when i view back the text he send to me.
am i not that good till you feel that this r'ship is a burden for you?
i didnt request anything from you.
i just need you to understand me.
and you never told me about your problems even though i asked you.
and you told me you need time to trust me.
am i look like not trustable to you?
perhaps ya.
and i understand that. i didnt forced you to tell me too.
you said i didnt treat you like a boyf.
well, izit that important to tell the whole world that we are in a relationship?
i thought you said you dont mind about these when we were together at first.
i never deny when my friends ask me.
i admit that you are my boyf when my friends ask me.
still it is not enough for you.
i apologized for that and still you dont want to give us another chance.
you are giving up so easily when you faced problems.
i feel dissapointed but well, maybe you deserved a better girlf.
i hate myself for still thinking of you!
however, i promise myself to forget you as soon as possible.
it seems that i'm the only one who feel sad and cried for the r'ship.
it seems like doesnt matter for you.
i understood and i know is time for me to give up.
yes!
i will give up..
i know i will meet someone who is much better in the future:)
i know i can..
:)

finally!

OHYES!
finally, interaction camp was over.
honestly, i feel "berat hati" when the camp was officially end.
we plan and prepared so well for few months.
but happy times will forever pass very fast.
our 2 days 1 night camp just pass like that.
i was overjoyed with the participants respond even though we cant manage to get 40 participants
yet, i can proudly said that the camp was SUCCESSFUL!
i enjoy myself throughout the camp especially with the extreme activities!
first time ever i went for caving and waterfall abseiling.
was a wonderful experience!
and i get to know many little brothers. HAHA
all those participants are little boys.
they are just too cute for me.
they call me "mum" throughout the camp cause they say i take care so well on them
haha:D
so proud of it.
somemore they say they didnt feel regret for joining the camp.
it seriously melt my heart when i received good respond from the participants.
we seriously laugh and enjoy alot throughout the camp.
i would like to say that i dont feel regret for organizing the camp even though we faced alot of challenges at first.
broga hill camp!
i will never forget about it.
the happiness, the laughter, the hiking time that i went through with the participants.
thanks so much for the committees group!:)
well done for us! *claps hand*
hees.
thanks for the participants(guang liang) that help me alot during caving :)
thanks for (jia rong and wilson) that wait and lend a hand for me during hiking.
without them, i think i hardly climb up the hill.
HAHA
never forget about the instructors of broga hill camp
THUMBS UP for you guys.
last but not least, thanks for joining our camp.
love you guys so much!
mwahhh.
you guys rocks my uni life!
i hope you guys seriously enjoy throughout the camp <3
below are some of the photos we snap during camp:)
p/s: wilson say he will rate me 9 out 10 for my marks XD
he say he minus 1 marks cause i mumble them too much :P

it was tiring yet enjoyable.
*at peak of broga hill*

with my "sons"  who act giyomi at midvalley. xD

the pretty girls i met during camp :)

us during camp fire X)

BBQ time :D

girls ;)

with my sis where most of the participants say i look more like elder sis(as i expected) :/

tiring face at broga hill! :)

beautiful scenery. love this photo so much <3

my pretty vivi x)

wilson, me, ying hui(sorry for using so long time to memorize your name), jia rong :)

group photo with instructors! ;)

thanks jia rong for helping me so much during hiking :P
p/s: we wore almost the same tee! XD 

tadaaa:)

us, the committees!:)

my "sons" X)
(eric, vincent, jeffrey, wilson) 

pretty lvze :)

after caving and waterfall abseiling :D

midvalley!

with the instructors ;)

crazy us:)

with one of my cute little son, wilson ;)

wanna see more photos? 

go to,  https://www.facebook.com/media/set/?set=a.560649497308248.1073741825.100000896081992&type=1

enjoy:)

a smile doesnt mean anything

a smile doesnt mean anything

YES.

absolutely!

I AGREED with the statement.

i dont know since when i become so emotional.

perhaps, i cant really handle my stress nowadays.

stress from society

stress from assignments

stress from midterms

stress from friends

stress from result

stress from everywhere.

i think my brain gonna burst out with all those stress!

hellyeah.

it seriously make my life dull and tired.

i always tell myself that i can handle it well.

and yes, at first i can.

but when u fail and try and fail and try and try over and over again.

you will feel tired!

i'm also a human okay?

everyday, i will keep reminding myself that tomorrow will be better.

and yeah.

people around are concerning about me

well, they just dont understand what i feel.

i will be alright. i will always stay strong.

or else i will just fall easily! NO!

that shouldnt happen in my dictionary!

i will just keep reminding myself i'm alright.

YES.

i'm alright:)

even though i'm tired, i will just stay strong and say i'm alright. 

so, just smile and faced it toughly! 

randomly life!

hey yo.
i guess my blog was so death for the past few months.
i am just too lazy to update my stuff.
YES.
i am lazy!
there are too many stuff to update here.
HAHA.
so, let's just cut it short.
firstly, yes. i am in a relationship.
secondly, i should just update all the photo here.
then i can just cut my crap short.
but wtf. i cant upload any photo since i'm using my younger sis lappie.
so i got to upload some of the photos when i blog using my own lappie.
thirdly, i'm seriously fall in love to this korean idol group name "BOYFRIEND"
they are seriously so cute and young! ;)
fourth, i watch few movies recently.
but the movie i love most is AH BOY TO MEN
it's highly recommended.
i love the storyline and the actors.
one of the actors which i admired most is joshua.
you can view his blog(below is the link) :)
http://joshuatwe.blogspot.com.au/
muahahhaha.
he looks so cute inside the movie!
i think i got fall to cute guy! :P
fifth, i am overstress with my society stuff.
nobody will understand what i fell.
the pressure and tension you will receive from numerous people.
i know i doesnt lead well but i already try my best.
when can i get rid of these stressful life!
sixth, my assignments and midterms!
this sem is like torns of assignments and midterms which seems to be forever cant finish :X
sigh.
what can i do is just browse some of the video to cheer me up!
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=LyDhaTKbhvo
fall in love with the show named "HELLOBABY"
hees. highly recommended to those who love to kpop.
lesson i learn from previous month,
nobody will help you when you need help.
the one can only help you is yourself!
friends are like wind.
they wont stop for you when you are seriously in need.
seriously, this is what i found out! :X
i'm not mentioning who. so dont get me wrong.
bye:)