:')

i dont know what i want actually.

somehow, people dunno how to appreciate when ur boyf treat u good.

the people is ME.

=.=

ohmygosh

i dunno wth happen to my brain

shouldnt i felt bless or glad when my boyf treat me good?

but the feeling he give me is like he treat me too good.

and i feel myself so bad for not treating him that good.

people around always praise "ehhh, ur boyf so good"

he wait for u outside ur class even though his class dismiss earlier.

and after i dismiss i saw him and i just say a simple "hi"

some people will just say "yerr, why u so bad" or "why u dont talk to him more"

wth.

i didnt ask him to find me and i told him that i'm in rush.

cause i need to meet my advisor after my class and i need to go sying house to do smth.

feel like a burden?

no, NOT AT ALL!

i shouldnt think like this.

he treat me too good!

i should feel bless and glad.

but i guess only people that know me deeply well know what i'm thinking.

i dont like sticking to my boyf.

and this is the FACT.

human is always say dont mind this dont mind that.

but that was only from their mouth and NOT their HEART.

i try my best to treat him good.

i seriously try.

but sometimes i just feel fed up.

perhaps, is my assignments and mid terms driving me crazy.

feel like crying out and talking to someone.

but who will seriously understand me?

cause i, ME, myself dunno what i want X'(

i guess i should appreciate him before i lose him.

i dont hope the incident will repeat again like terry :'(

can my BRAIN function like a normal girls?:(

well, i still went out with friends.

but with a fake smile on my face to cover my problems:') 

no, if i talk to others, what will they think about me?

a BAD girl for not appreciating a GOOD boyf?

or instead they thought i showing off to them.

hardly to find someone to talk to :'(

thats why i always wish i can go back to form 1

my precious class with my lovely class teacher pn.sofiah.

miss her so much<3

 i aint crying but i'm just dropping my tears for him.